NHL 30 IN 30: MINNESOTA WILD - One Wild Night

Dear Wild Fanatics, 2011-2012 was one helluva "Wild" ride wasn't it? Get it, see how I used Wild in that sentence....is this thing on? After a strong start to the season, winning 20 of our first 30 games, we decided to take some time off for Christmas break, and never really came back, dropping 37 of our next 52. It must have been those red and green jerseys.... Look at the bright side, we still finished with a better record over 6 other teams. This means we were in the top 80% record-wise, we equates to B on the grading scale!! Our leading scorer was Dany Heatley, who we deftly acquired for Martin Havlat. Don't pay attention to the fact that he had it lowest output for his career, and his skillset has slowly diminished over the past 4 seasons. With a healthy Saku Koivu by his side, he'll return to his 40-goal self in no time. What's that you say, our Captain is Mikko Koivu? Well I'm sure he'll be a great new addition to our team. After speaking recently at a Conference attended by the Steinbrenners and Dan Snyder, they let me in on a secret of theirs. They all agreed, the only way to win a championship, is to spend lots of cash. I threw every last dime I had out the window this offseason to appease you, the fanatics. We, the team of the Twin Cities, signed Ryan Suter and Zach Parise to "twin" contracts at $98 million over 13-years. See what I did again with that play on words!! In addition, I signed a 4th line center, Torrey Mitchell for $1.9 million. With these signings along with 4 of our top players (Nicklas Backstrom, Heatley, Matt Cullen, and Devin Setoguchi) returning from the surgical table, we should be back up to 3rd place in no time. Of course I meant 3rd place in the Division, because there's no better way to antagonize the United States most dedicated hockey fan base, than to constantly put out an underachieving line-up. Thanks again for your continued support of the North Stars.....err Wild!! - Minnesota Sports & Entertainment